Ode to the PACU Nurse

I am a PACU Nurse That’s what I love to be

You gotta love the Uro men “Nurse, I have to pee”!

The patients they come rolling out With a hiss and a roar

They never come in steadily Often too many to ignore

Handover can be a challenge “Nurse, he’s had this and that”

Whilst we are busy hooking-up There is no time to chat

The anaesthetist wants to bolt The scrub nurse stands impatiently

Notes in hand, ready to tell What they had operationally

The monitors keep on beeping The LMA is in position

We try to count the resps And finish the admission

 But the patient starts to move Then out comes the tube

They wriggle here and there As we try not to disapprove

The obs we try to monitor We keep a careful eye

Then nurse “I’m gonna be sick” It just makes you want to cry

 You reach for the anti-emetic With shaking hands you prepare

A syringe of magic potion Vomit if you dare!

The paperwork starts to mount The patient says the pain is worse

You grab a vial of Morphine Trying not to curse

You breathe a sigh of relief As the pain starts to abate

Then the surgeon prods them You resist the urge to berate

Finally it’s time to ring the ward Can you beat hand-over time?

The ward phone rings and rings Of course, we cut it fine!

 It’s time to shut the OR And finish for the day

They bring them all to PACU And go on their merry way

PACU then becomes too full You say “stop” we have to close

But alas there is no respite And we continue with the show

It’s 5pm, the witching hour The OR’s work is done

But left to their own devices The PACU nurse cracks on

We are on the round-about With all the exits blocked

We try to clear the back-log Whilst racing against the clock

Without the PACU Nurse Where would we be?

Up the creek without a paddle And floundering in the sea!

Devika Cook  PACU Conference  Auckland October 2015