Ode to the PACU Nurse

I am a PACU Nurse

That’s what I love to be

You gotta love the Uro men

“Nurse, I have to pee”!

The patients they come rolling out

With a hiss and a roar

They never come in steadily

Often too many to ignore

Handover can be a challenge

“Nurse, he’s had this and that”

Whilst we are busy hooking-up

There is no time to chat
 

The anaesthetist wants to bolt

The scrub nurse stands impatiently

Notes in hand, ready to tell

What they had operationally
 

The monitors keep on beeping

The LMA is in position

We try to count the resps

And finish the admission
 

But the patient starts to move

Then out comes the tube

They wriggle here and there

As we try not to disapprove
 

The obs we try to monitor

We keep a careful eye

Then nurse “I’m gonna be sick”

It just makes you want to cry
 

You reach for the anti-emetic

With shaking hands you prepare

A syringe of magic potion

Vomit if you dare!

The paperwork starts to mount

The patient says the pain is worse

You grab a vial of Morphine

Trying not to curse

You breathe a sigh of relief

As the pain starts to abate

Then the surgeon prods them

You resist the urge to berate

Finally it’s time to ring the ward

Can you beat hand-over time?

The ward phone rings and rings

Of course, we cut it fine!

 

It’s time to shut the OR

And finish for the day

They bring them all to PACU

And go on their merry way

PACU then becomes too full

You say “stop” we have to close

But alas there is no respite

And we continue with the show

 

It’s 5pm, the witching hour

The OR’s work is done

But left to their own devices

The PACU nurse cracks on

We are on the round-about

With all the exits blocked

We try to clear the back-log

Whilst racing against the clock

Without the PACU Nurse

Where would we be?

Up the creek without a paddle

And floundering in the sea!

 

 

Devika Cook

PACU Conference

Auckland

October 2015